22.2.07 | The End of The Fookin' World!!! (Yes it's a fookin' "whinge post ok!?!)

Here at The Saturnynes Lounge, we like to bring you the BIG stories and today we're touching upon the end of the world and the signs and portents that are an obvious foretelling of dooms to come...

And i have to tell you, it doesn't start with floods, bad weather or nuclear war (Although it might well end with such things)


It starts with the small things. The lark that is no longer heard, the sunflower in winter, the closing of your favourite shops.

Yes the closing of your favourite shops, dammit! At the end of last year, the Saturnynes life-long and cherished favourite toyshop of all time did close. Mr Benn's, a place i have visited since childhood and evoked with it's name, an equally loved childhood cartoon, has bloody well closed and my lovely shop friends have all gone!

I'm hurting dammit! The world has stomped all over my sensitive nature with size 100 booties. Then invited it's friends and neighbours to come and do the same. The shop where i bought my first action man (In Nazi SS uniform, no less! Oh how i loved the sartorial elegance of those nice SS soldiers and officers in their swish greys and blacks. Possibly leading to suspicions amongst one elderly relative that i might "bat for the other side" pshaw! Thank-you for the vote of confidence dead Grandma, but i think numerous fondlings and sticky situations later, some involving actual real girls, i think i can lay that one to rest, ok?). And the lego! And the airfix models with paints and glues to fuck them up real bad! A million toy soldiers! Eventually i even let the Allies win! And when George Lucas slagged us Star Wars onto the scene, i was an avid collector of all the figures and vehicles. Finally from the age of 14, i found the game to indulge my vast and endless imagination. Dungeons and Dragons proved to be endlessly inventive and thrilling and even hillariously funny. I still think about it and play variations of it to this day. Mainly the Bad Guys with nowadays... well, y'gotta strive for realism...

But that's not all! The last fookin' music shop in town has fookin' well closed too! So my little location has no toys and no music (ok there's a small specialist music shop that i frequent for my Shimmydisc rarities etc... but it's too fookin' small goddammit!)

But that's not all, either! My local library is fookin' well closing! not that's going to be a big loss, not with the local council continually reducing the opening hours to 5 mins a day or something equally foul and disgusting. Bah!

Yes, it's the end of the fooking world!



PS: So if you want a shag, now's the time to get in touch...


  8:54 pm :. Blogger Starbuck hollered thusly:

Kendal Shag? OK.

Got any skins?

  12:42 am :. Blogger Carl hollered thusly:

Got one thanks.

  11:34 am :. Blogger Spitting Blood hollered thusly:

Must be endemic. My favorite seaside indie comic shop, 'Off World' has also closed it doors. I no more can visit pixie boy with his green teeth and pointed ears.


  10:17 am :. Blogger {illyria} hollered thusly:

the P.S. got me.

  2:16 pm :. Blogger De.vile hollered thusly:

I cant promise a shag, but would you be cool with it if I settled that in several hug installments?

  5:53 pm :. Blogger The Saturnyne hollered thusly:

Starbuck: Yes and yes.

Carl: You bastard! You stole my punchline!

Janey: Ono! AND they just killed poor old Captain America *cry* (it's a sign of the times, i tell ya!)

{illyria}: Muhahaha! Yeah, and totally not a cunning plan to get lotsa free sex.... honest!

de.vile: Hugs are great! So are seabirds!


  5:59 pm :. Anonymous Anonymous hollered thusly:

Left a comment here.

And nice of you, old man, to add my link (twotonerecords)to your page. Shame it don't work. One forward-slash too many, me thinks.

  9:55 pm :. Blogger The Saturnyne hollered thusly:

Heya Max

Sorted! =)


  10:22 pm :. Blogger Aberrant Templar hollered thusly:

Aah yes. D&D, Star Wars, comic books and cartoons. All the trappings of my childhood, teenage years, and ... um ... mid 20s.

You know, the teenage years had their rough spots but apparently "geek" is sexy now.

Or maybe I just work at a college filled with geeky girls who have a fetish for geeky men who can name every character that comes on screen at any point in the Original Trilogy. Even the background characters.

  11:08 pm :. Blogger ... hollered thusly:


got here thanks to blog hopping - love the way you fookin write!

yup, its the end of the fookin world.. maybe fiikin world is coming up next? :)

i can understand you hating cornerstones of your childhood disappear - i hate when that happens

  3:00 pm :. Blogger Woman at the well hollered thusly:

Yes, my dear, it´s the end of the old ways and all the things we took for granted will disappear faster and faster now ...
Was it better in the past or will it be better from now on?

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9.2.07 | Tourettes Syndrome: A Users Guide





  10:29 am :. Blogger Spitting Blood hollered thusly:

Ha! I used that word silently many times yesterday due to intolerable stress at work. Silently, because I have been told that occasionally my language and phraseology is not appropriate to my work setting. All I did was tell a colleague to go show their head up their arse.

Delicate little six foot 20 stone man flower that he is couldn't cope with threatening 5 foot 9 stone woman....


  10:30 am :. Blogger Spitting Blood hollered thusly:

Shove their head even....!

  4:38 am :. Blogger De.vile hollered thusly:

The world is a little cruel sometimes. I am glad that you can swear and make it alright :)

  11:10 pm :. Anonymous Anonymous hollered thusly:

I'm tourette's, my dear Sat

  12:47 am :. Blogger The Saturnyne hollered thusly:

No, the word you're looking for is "Pedant" i assure you.

Welcome to my pedant baiting website.



  4:48 am :. Blogger The Saturnyne hollered thusly:

Or are you admitting to being a tourette's sufferer?

If so, i must say, it's not a very good admission... aren't you meant to be calling me a fooker while bearing your soul?

tsk tsk! now get back here and do some swearing with me!



  8:52 pm :. Blogger Starbuck hollered thusly:

Am I too late to add a few swear words?

Blinking heck.

  12:43 pm :. Anonymous Anonymous hollered thusly:



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