Hi Saturnyne! What a totally funny and original post you've made there. I laughed me arse off, i was laughing so much! Plus i ruptured several internal organs, including and especially my lungs, and bled to death through my mouth in a huge and beautifully reflective pool of blood. Several people walking nonchalantly past my corpse afterwards, had lots of fun using same pool of blood as a makeshift slide.

...meanwhile, my liver absconded and appeared on several childrens television shows... it will then be duetting in a single with Kylie Minogue for a special Christmas single...
(I have unusual blood, in that it freezes on contact with the air...demonic parentage, y'see)
(Where's me comments, you fackin' tossers!)

I feeeel unlooooved! *sob*

Wow, Saturnyne! You're sharper than a twist of lemon that's been sculpted into a very fine point! Absolute genius!

You shame all other bloggers into mediocrity with your sublime and matchless ability to throw words around like paper cups.

Honest!

LOL!!!!!!!!!!! *ROFLMAO!!!!*

Good lord that was hilarious! *wipes eyes and applauds*

Lizzy!!! Thankyouthankyouthankyou!!! You are officially my best friend on the internet today.

(hugs LIzzy and gives her flowers)

Ok. Amanda! Yow can be moi besty friend tomorrow, then!

S.x

Who is this Pumpkin that she doesn't appreciate such sentiment?!

WEll, Jessie, Pumpkin has many many great qualities, one of which is a tolerance to my general dumbness and crazed ideas.

She's mah bestest friend in the whole world. Not my gf though as some have supposed... although we did go through such a stage...

She's an incredibly kind and generous person though. And i love her. AStonishingly, she loves me too!

=}

been a while since i saw you posting on me blog. Thought it was a one-off... Do you come here often? (THe Saturnyne amuses himself with that last sentence) Methinks i shall have to take a peek at your own blog again an' see who you are a bit more...

Oh you know, I stop by now and then... had some trouble with your Ulysses post though, being something of a freak for punctuation myself.

I expect you to now lament my inability to see beyond the constraints of grammar and punctuation to a wide wide world of artistic expression... to which I say "Bollocks!"

Hah, i know what you mean about punctuation. One can quite forget how to breathe without a nicely placed full stop or comma here and there...

I say "Bollocks" cheerily back atcha. One can never have enough bollocks in the world....um, i mean that metaphorically of course... the literal imagery of that would be rather disturbing... ergh!

My uncle recently developed a strong loathing for punctuation errors, mainly in the form of spelling and the use of apostrophes. One day, whilst driving to work he stopped at some traffic lights and noticed a sign someone had put up on the railings next to the lights. It read ‘Jims Removal Company’ then some address details. As you may have noticed there was the apostrophe missing which made my uncle wince every time he drove past. One day he bought a board marker and took it with him on his way to work then when he stopped at the traffic lights he got out of his car, pen in hand and corrected the sign, then got back in and drove to work.

Also, once when my uncle and aunt went out for lunch on the menu they had spelt three items wrong on their menu, expresso, lasagna and glenfiddutch (whisky). My uncle wanted to get them corrected but my aunt tried to make him just ignore it an order but when the waitress came over for their drinks he pointed them out to her and she just looked at him blankly then nodded and disappeared. Then she came back 20 or so minutes later with an espresso, a plate of lasagne and a glass of glennfidditch much to the amusement of my aunt. As it turns out the waiter was French and didn’t speak much English.

Slightly off the grammatical side this time it’s a phonological (that’s right I can use big words too!) error. Ok, so my aunt and uncle have gone to one of those fancy French restaurants as you do (although you wouldn’t think of one being situated in Manchester). Everyone in their spoke with a French accent so he took their ordered and returned with the wine they had ordered complete with an ice bucket. Then he said “wood Madame like to try ze wyn thirst?” and when he pulled out the wine, the icy water dripped all over my aunt’s leg and the waiter immediately said in a thick Manchester accent “Blimey, sorry luv I didn’t mean to-” at which he broke off due to the huge smiles on the faces of my aunty and uncle at his sudden change in accent. Then the waiter was in quite a dilemma, should he carry on speaking in his normal accent or should he put on the French accent again? He then continued to serve them through all 3 courses in his phoney French accent much to the amusement of my aunt and uncle.

may be long, but worth a read i'd say ;)

Alex